In July

IN JULY


In July I go outside and there is the sun
And I lied when I said "I love you" I've never loved anyone
And I cried, but when I was done I was as empty as when I begun

God strike me down on my path
Let me know of your wrath
This is all that I ask
Let me feel your wrath
So I may not stray from my path

In July I'm finally alive
I'm finally a spectacle beheld
With her eyes on the horizon
She says what she felt

In the nights we go
We become our own
We intertwine in the meadows
We go on our own in meadows
As silent as those
Who sneak past their foes
We go, we go, we go

God strike me down on my path
Let me know of your wrath
This is all that I ask
Let me feel your wrath
So I may not stray from my path

We are innocent and naked in the water
We are buoyant with the beliefs of our fathers
We can do no wrong by them
We are as precious as gems
In the water

In the fall I denounce my love and claim it for a fraud
On my path I've lost my way and now cannot stand my God
I shall not make you an idol or at your feet shall I laud
As believers stomp their feet and at your deeds they applaud
I shall be punished by the deacons who will whip me with rods
God strike me down, strike me down! Now! Strike me down! Now!

In July I go outside and there is the sun
And I lied when I said "I love you" I've never loved anyone
And I cried, but when I was done I was as empty as when I begun

I've never loved anyone but I may be loved in your eyes
I've never had a decent thing to say but there is July
I've found myself in July
I've lied and cried and a scoundrel am I, but I can fly
I can fly in July with the sun outside
And I am finally alive
And I am finally alive

This Is a Poem?

THIS IS A POEM?

Let's act just like we're normal because we both know we're not
We'll laugh because we hate ourselves but seriously we love ourselves
And won't it be so ironic? Won't the kids just be so shocked?

Well the sad thing Is we do wanna be just like them
And they wouldn't take us
So we're gunna show them we can be cool all on our own
And that's why we rebelled in the first place
And now we're gunna act just like them

Is there anyone just not trying to prove himself?
If there is, I'd surely love to meet him
But then again it's probably an act
So we want to act like we're not acting at all

If the worlds a stage then we're all the drama queens
So caught up in our roles that we forget what it all means
And What the hell does it all mean?

The coolest kids are those who don't fit in at all
Because they don't compromise or try to catch attention
Or maybe they didnt have the guts or maybe they tried but failed to catch attention
Either way they stayed the same
And will be better for it in the end

Let's act like we're normal
So we know how it feels
To act just like everyone we secretly want to be
But are too proud to let it just be
And what the hell does it all mean?

Blazing

BLAZING

Are you okay?

If the answer is no

Would you tell me so

Or would you tell me otherwise

Don't feed me lies

Are you okay?

Don't beat yourself up

Lift your chin to the sky

You're so better than this

Let me tell you why

When the satalites and the stars collide

And the fireflies fall from the sky

It's raining light in the sky tonight

It's so amazing and blazing with light

And on a night like tonight

How can't you feel alive?

I feel like the world could forget me in an instant

I feel like giving it all up to die

All the world lives out their lives, and if one was missing

Who would really miss it? Would I?

I rode to your house on my bike

Just in time to see you on the rooftop

I screamed "You don't wanna end it tonight!

Let me talk, and please just please stop!"

She said, "what do I have to life for?

What can I really offer?

There's no hope

So I'll give up the ghost

The world's so hard, that the ground seems softer"

"You don't wanna die like this

Think of all the life you'll miss

I came hear to save you from yourself

Just listen to me, and I can be of help"

Don't beat yourself up

Lift your chin to the sky

You're so much better than this

Let me save your life

Whenever you feel down and out

Don't be rash, we can talk it out

That's what friendship's all about

And you and me like brothers we'll be

lifted to the sky, I have no doubt

Are you okay?

If the answer is no

Just let me know

And I'll show you how much you mean to me

Olivia and Her Love: Chapter 14

There was once a house of glass
With the master of the manor being a man of
Very mysterious manners
He would glance at anyone who happened to pass
Outside his window

Yes, indeed, it's quite hard to sneak up on someone who has a house of glass
No, this gentleman did not fit the standards
But that's awful hard to do when your house is a terrible mass
Of clear sand and crystal, oh so brittle

The fiances had now spotted the house and the gentleman inside
For who could miss him in his crystal abyss
Of tears freshly cried

The couple said that they were tired from the trip
And the master of the manor promised to keep good fellowship
"And apart from having quirks everything in the house works,"
He assured them, "And as a house it's quite alright."
So the couple said they'd stay, if only for the night

The master was actually good with confrontation
Except that mid conversation
He'd break out in tongues
He said that they were special blessings from the Lord, that built up in his lungs
"And besides some of my quirks, I'm still in my right mind"

Olivia and Her Love: Chapter 13

This chapter holds quite a fateful number
An Omen, a curse, that predicts future blunders
and in this case it is much the same
But for the young man and his bride to be
Luck has seemed never to agree
And it seems that there's always a cloud of rain
And when there's rain, there's thunder

After spending tender moments by the shore
They vowed never to see this town anymore
They could only do damage by staying
But in leaving they've done worse by far

With the night about and the lantern fraying
As they left the town, they'd leave a scar
The man took out a candle
And then took out a match
Thew that at his feet
Which was more than the dry leaves could handle
Because instantly they started to catch
And out of them was to hatch
The small town's defeat

The couple vowed that as they left they wouldn't look back
But if they had they'd see the town lit
By them not wanting to hurt the people they charred them black
And neither of the two knew a bit
That as they walked out of town, it was on fire along with every person in it

Olivia and Her Love: Chapter 12

So Olivia and the boy with a shark for a hand
Had now devised a needed plan
To move away from all the people who didn't understand
So they didn't have to maim
Everyone who wanted to see them apart
And it would be the same
Because when your in love, you never have a change of heart

For now they needed to be out of reach
So they decided to go to the beach
Where they first laid eyes on each other
And where the boy had won the girl over

"Sweet Olivia, no one thinks that we should be
But you're still here with me
Darling Olivia, I've had to kill most of your family
But you didn't abandon me
Dear, Dear Olivia, I have something on my mind
And the words are kind of hard to find
When I've said my peace, I'm sure you'll see
Why it was so hard for me."
Then the young man got on one knee
And took out a crystal from the see
It was attached to a golden band
Which he slip onto her ruby hand
And said finally,
"Olivia, my dear, will you marry me?"

And of course she said yes and started to cry
And as the sun set behind them and larks flew by
They shared a kiss that didn't finish until the sun was gone beneath the sea

Olivia and Her Love: Chapter 11

I hope that last chapter didn't turn you off
Or make you sick
Too much that you stop reading this
Well If you're still here with me
I have plenty more for you to read
And I promise It won't be as bad as that

The boy with the shark for a hand put a muzzle on up to his wrist
Because hurting Olivia was a risk
When he had to carry her to the hospital
If her father hadn't have pushed her
This wouldn't have happened at all

Olivia slept sound in the hospital bed
Her skin was cracked and extra red
And dark bruises were showing up
At least she wasn't dead and nothing had broke
When she finally awoke
Here voice so soft that only the boy heard when she spoke
"What happened?" she questioned
The boy told her and said
"I'm sorry but your old man is dead."
She said back in a voice covered in black
"Don't even bother, that man was not my father."
And they stayed quiet after that
like all the sound in the world couldn't answer their questions

Who else would have to die before these two could be happy and alive?

FACE VALUE

FACE VALUE

I want to do so much for you
I want to make you proud
But when you've done all that you can do
Sometimes the only step to take is down

What do you want me to say?
Do you have to smother and damn?
The magic just went away
at the end of the day
Could you just let me be what I am?

This is me, honestly
Maybe I'm not meant to be great
Don't you see, this is me
It's not up for debate
Won't you please, forgive me?
I'm sorry I'm second rate
But this is me, honestly

I can't do better than this because this is all there is
Maybe I'm not supposed to be the best or even who you are
Can't you just take me for what I am?
After I've fallen so far

It's not right, but who am I to say who's right or wrong?
We don't honestly know, so we try to play along
I've done my best for you
Take it at face value

Olivia and Her Love: Chapter 10

WARNING!! this chapter is VERY disturbing/violent. Read only if your stomach can stand it.




On the way to the morgue was whence
The father got his cumupence
Even though it was grim, his corpse hadn't had enough karma yet
And this is about as violent as it gets
But the father's body had fell out of the back
Of the ambulance and was under attack
By wolves who's cold eyes were deep and black
And who ripped the father limb from limb
Casting his innards whilst splaying him
I'm sorry, but I warned you it would be grim

His blood flowed down the rocks as birds pecked his motionless face
Even the maggots had come to get a taste
It seemed that all the animals had assembled
To poke and prod and rip through his flesh
Till all that was left was a ghastly mess
Of hair and bones and sinew
If you say it, you wouldn't eat for a week, I bet you
And in this pile of decaying mush
I admit that there wouldn't be much
To keep anyone up at night
Or haunt anyone's life

It was quite humiliating I'm sure you can appreciate
Made worse, because all the animals chose to defecate
All of the father that they'd digested
Back on the pile of pulp and then left it
What a graceful way to decay

Olivia and Her Love: Chapter 9

This chapter starts where the last left off
With the boy in the doorway and Olivia fallen from her loft
She screamed and writhed before fainting from pain
From atop the stairs with his gun full
Of bullets and pointed at the young man's skull
This ending could not be soft

"You've meddled enough, boy, look what you've made me do!"
With these words the father's anger grew
Into a crazed yell from the bowels of hell
Where the demons take turns devouring you

Now most people didn't know that in reality
The shark hand had a personality
But it certainly did and it's only moods
are bitter, unruly rage and how to get food
And in both thes cases the father seemed fit
The shark's intentions became clear as it chewed at the bit
Spewing saliva in buckets of spit
Rage is like a bucket and when it's full it spills
That's why the father's face had grown wild
And his lips curled up into a twisted smile
And he kept this expression all the while
The shark hand bit and bit and bit
Tearing out the father's throat
And in one last cry he screamed,
"I hope I keep you up at night and never let you dream!"

Olivia and Her Love: Chapter 8

But dreams can sometimes be a mirage
And they don't always go unsabotaged
By those we used to love
Who start to push and shove
Because they're jealous, even of a young man
Whose life had already been beaten
Because of his abnormality, aka the shark hand
Which, who could forget?

The father? Yes, the father of Olivia!
He has now wormed his way into the plot
After the death of his son he'd been stewing away his days
In the basement with a shotgun, his eyes ablaze

[Knocking at the front door]
"God, that boy is back again
Always wanting more
Leading my baby to bed, even though her skin is red
I'll blow off his goddamn head!"
That was his inner monolauge, his plot to rob a life from a young man

He snuck to the attic for a birds eye view
Of the boy who was knocking
"This bullet, my boy, will be the end of you."
But just then, his daughter burst in
With her crimson skin
And correctly in fact stated
"You're no father of mine, and you'll always be hated."

This was an outrage
How dare she put him through this sufferage?
So in his bout of anger
He went and did something terrible
He pushed his daughter
He pushed her
And she fell
Reddened and battered
At the feet of the young man with a shark for a hand....

Olivia and Her Love: Chapter 7

With growing up comes growing apart
Our lives change
And we have a change of heart
But the boy and Olivia
Never ever fell out of love
people lose each other
friends exchange
But the boy and Olivia never had freinds from the start

And if they did, which Olivia did,
At first sight of the boy with a shark for a hand
They all went and hid
So it was
Only each other
Deep in the garden of love

Where the seasons never alter
There's no tricks to fall for
The emotions never falter
Not deep in there in the garden of love

Where no one can find you
The feelings always shine through
Because they are finally true
Deep in the garden of love

Where the boy with the shark for a hand and
His darling Olivia stayed
There in the sof flowerbed they laid
And grew up to the age of eighteen
Their lives a magical dream
That was in no hurry
Because it was deeply buried
Deep in the garden of love

Olivia and Her Love: Chapter 6

At this point and time, You've probably started to wonder
What happened to the parents of utter blunder
What happened since they left their child in thunder
On the streets with a shark for a hand
They had forgot his name by ten
But they had abandoned him long before then
Crying but alive
Lost in the streets of Chicago
Where was he to go
At the tender age of five?

After leaving him there they moved to Wyoming
To cover themselves in the sweet smelling spring
And forget their son was alive
They used to keep a scrapbook
They barely used that
They'd hardly ever take a look
And eventually left it for scrap
With pictures of their sorry lives
And the young boy before five

The father of the child became a miner
And the mother of the accident couldn't have felt any finer
The saddest part is in pretending that they never had a son
They never did and he wasn't so
So they couldn't let him go
Because he was already gone and went
Nothing but a ghost
And all the money they gave him, he went and spent
On a ticket to the coast
To one day meet his darling Olivia

Olivia and Her Love: Chapter 5

Now not everyone thought this bond practical
Olivia had a brother with a plot
To foil the couple with every chance he got
because he wanted all this foolishness to stop
his sister was fragile and all the while
This dangerous boy was trying to get her hot
"She doesn't need that," he thought
"Because she'd already be burned once
and once was enough"

After months of trying to split them up
Things took a devilish twist
He got the keys to his father's pick up truck
And said, "I'm sorry it has come to this"
Murder is never the answer to choose first
Because it rips things apart and makes them hurt worse
But when someone's trying to run you over
There's not much time to think
The boy with a shark for a hand had one last plan
To sink the truck in the big drink
So he ran to the dock with the truck on his heals
And it chased him right off the dock
wettening the wheels
The machine has sunk like a rock
And the brother never surfaced
Olivia stood horrified on the beach as her true love came out of the sea

Olivia and Her Love: Chapter 4

After falling in love
One must realize sacrifices must be made
And for both of them debts would have to be paid
For Olivia could touch nothing without pain
Felt brisk
And seeing as the boy had a shark for a hand, this was
A terrible risk
But he said poetically and unnervingly realistically:

"I love you but I have a shark for a hand
I can't save you from the swallowing quicksand
Of our lives, and as hard as we try
You'll always be fried, and darling,I'll always have a shark for a hand."

But that didn't stop their love
Which could never be broken
And they grew closer together despite both having
Doubts unspoken

They would stay in her room on days without gloom
And laugh and laugh and play her phonograph
And when she would use it
It played such beautiful music
That they would close their eyes
And not laugh, but grow very serious
Olivia said that the string section was close to her heart
And the boy said it reminded him of the lark
And after that they'd stay quite quiet
And listen to music and immerse themselves in it
It was the most beautiful times of their lives
They were meant to spend this time togoether
Two birds of a feather of a very romantic lark

Olivia and Her Love: Chapter 3

Now comes the most tender moment yet
The time when our two heroes met
It was a moment they would never forget
It was a time that they would never regret
It was in fact quite quaint
Which most would say
That on this day
That it ain't
Because it was dreary, but dreary days for Olivia was the best time to be outside
Where she laint

And if anyone saw her or if anyone spied
On this day she had started and continued to cry
And on this day of drear, who could bring her cheer?
Except for a charming young man
With a muzzle on his hand
And a face devoid of pried

He gave her a rock shaped like a heart
And said "this is what i received from a lark
Who came to me last night in the dark
and said 'give this to the prettiest girl on the beach'"
And since they were on a beach and Olivia was in fact a girl
This was the perfect thing to say
So they both laid on the beach all day
and on that day, promptly fell in love

Olivia and Her Love: Chapter 2

The family in flight school lived in America
And they took Olivia there because
They felt compassion for such a child
They did not though understand
What happened to her parents
For their corpses were lost in the sand
Lying together with their mouths filled
With sand and their bodies wrapped in one another
Underneath the hill, lying for an eternity still
Fourteen was a tender year
More tender for her I fear
Because poor, sweet Olivia
Still had the sunburn head to toe
And ear to ear
A constant reminder of her parents lost and dear

But her life was good now
She had love from family and friends
And apart from having very sensitive skin
She had as normal a life as one could hope to spend

Unlike the boy with the shark for a hand
Whose life wasn't going as planned
He was fifteen and
His days weren't as grand
And no one could understand
The boy behind the shark hand
That is until he met Olivia with her ruby skin
And the next chapter in his life would begin

Olivia and Her Love: Chapter 1

Olivia and her love is an epic poem that I am slowly but surely composing. ya, there's LOTS of chapters to it. but here's the first!

CHAPTER 1

He was born with a shark for a hand
His parents had a name for him, but they forgot it by ten
What a tender age
With the extra baggage
Of an appendage
So unruly and ravage
He joined the scouts as a tenderfoot
But he scared all the boys and bit through all the knots
But he was growing up, and for him all was not lost
Not by a mile

Olivia was born on a hill in the Serengeti
Up there her mother wsa to bear and it was ready
But as she was having the child
Her labors grew wild
And she kicked her husband off of the hill
After which he had a terrible spill
After birth the mother got ill
And soon she grew very still
Leaving the orphaned baby to crawl
Through the rough sun filled Serengeti
and already her skin was reddening
The desert was no dessert and in fact quite deserted she learned
So poor Olivia had no shelter from the sun which sweltered and caused her skin to burn
But a nice family in flight school saw her laying in the sun
And that's how it all begun